DISCLOSURES

3. Provide Reassurance
Notes:

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Provide reassurance

  • that you believe them and
  • you are pleased they told you about this and they’ve done the right thing
  • that you do not think that they are to blame
  • keep everything as normal for the child as possible – don’t make a fuss
  • do not reward or show emotion – remain calm and reassuring
  • don’t make judgements about what has happened
  • tell them you know sometimes it can be hard to talk about these things
  • let them know that this has happened to other children and sometimes adults do wrong things
Information:

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Tip No 3 - Provide reassurance

This is the most important time of the disclosure.

This is when Emily needs to know that you believe her, that she did the right thing, and that you will take care of it now and she won’t be in trouble. Sometimes that just takes one word – or a reassuring hand or a cuddle.

But it’s important you act normally and be guided by how Emily is feeling. If you wouldn’t ordinarily hug her then don’t start now.

If you want to ask a child whether or not they want a hug – then always give them an option – because saying no, especially for child abuse victims, can be difficult. This is habit you can put in place every day.

For example if they fall and hurt themselves, you can say, “Did you want a hug or are you right to go?”

So if you’re asking Emily whether she wants a hug – make sure you make it easy for her to say no by selecting another option, eg “Did you want a hug or just sit for a minute?”

Be careful not to “reward” children either verbally or with shows of emotion for disclosing - as this could lead to false or embellished disclosures.